Month: June 2017

June 27, 2017 auticus No comments exist

It might be cliche, but I love you. I mean every world of that. I would gladly drop everything in order to help anyone who asked for it. It doesn’t matter to me if we have a past or not. If you need my help, I will help you, because I believe in unconditional love.

I recently saw a forum post about this topic, which was a debate of the validity of unconditional love, and if it does actually exist. As I’ve stated, I believe that yes, it does. But this post isn’t about trying to win you over to my side of thinking, or to change what you may already believe on this subject. If you don’t believe in unconditional love, that is fine. If you would rather refer to it as something else, I’m not going to fight you on it. I don’t think it matters what it’s called, as long as, in some form or another, it exists.

Unconditional love, to me, is just that, unconditional. I don’t expect anything back from you for what I offer. I don’t do what I do for anything other than to try and give you the best life I possibly can. I’ve recently started working in the mental health field, and I’ve already seen both sides of the spectrum in terms of gratitude. I’ve worked with people who are extremely grateful, and those who see you merely as a tool.

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June 13, 2017 auticus No comments exist

Years ago I started to tell myself a lie, this lie became the very core of who I was, and I believed it hook, line, and sinker. Only recently have I started to realise how deeply that lie affected me. The lie that I was broken. The lie had taken hold of me to such a degree that I ruined friendships over it.

When you believe that you are broken beyond repair, living life doesn’t seem to matter. You become a shell. It doesn’t matter how strong that outer shell is, it doesn’t change what’s on the inside. It wasn’t just a lie that I told myself, but one that was told to me. When I first told myself this lie, I saw it for what it was, and I reached out for help. But those I reached out to confirmed my lie instead of helping me out of it.

Eventually, I learned to live with it. I was broken, and there was nothing I could do about it. Along with that brokenness, I began to believe that I didn’t deserve happiness, I didn’t deserve friends, and I didn’t deserve to live.

For so many people, the story ends there. Never realising that they aren’t broken beyond repair. They never find the peace they are looking for because when you feel broken, all you see is the world telling you to be perfect or to get out.

But the truth is, you aren’t broken. You aren’t “damaged goods”.¬†whether it’s rape, abuse, mental illness, or anything else that causes you to believe that, know that it’s a lie. It’s a lie that we, as a culture, have become very good at telling. You also aren’t stuck in that place forever. You are lost, and you don’t have a map to help you out. You weren’t equipped to handle the situation, and blame yourself for that. In reality, it’s not your fault.

I can’t give you a step by step detailed instruction on how to get out and find your path again. All I can do is give advice, and say what worked for me. I found my way again by going to counselling, which lead to going back to school. I would highly encourage anyone to at least try out counselling. It’s a great starting point that would hopefully point you in the right direction and at least get you started on the path.

But, the most important thing, stop believing the lie. You aren’t broken, you aren’t forgotten. Above all else, it’s not your fault. You are loved, and it is my hope that you will rediscover the path that was taken from you and be able to carry on with your life. My e-mail is here on my site, and I would love nothing more than to give you further encouragement and support if you need it.